"The future freaks me out"

So I haven't made a post in quite awhile. I've been very busy. It's funny how I feel like I have so much to do, but if somebody asked me what I was doing at any particular moment, I would probably say nothing. I think it's just that I get so tired of everything, that I just need to sit and watch episode after episode of Dawson's Creek, which is exactly what I did this weekend. It was a nice break from reality, but I really need to buckle down. I have 3 more big lessons I have to teach in March, I have to take the Praxis II, and worse than that I have to study for the Praxis II. But I can't seem to find my motivation anywhere. And even though I am super excited to get my own classroom, as the time gets closer I just get more and more scared. What if I can't do it? What if I get a horrible class and realize that it was all a huge mistake? That I can't handle what I thought I want to do. I just wish I could push pause. I'm not ready to grow up and do everything on my own. I just want to stay 21 and hang out with my friends and watch 90's primetime television. Future is a scary word. It evokes excitement and fear all at the same time. It's something I need to start adjusting to; if only I could find my motivation.